What exactly is Madrona?
Madrona = lots of fiber packed fun.
From February 14th through the17th at the Hotel Murano (formerly the Sheraton), in Tacoma Washington, thousands of fiber-hungry knitters will gather to buy and sell yarn and learn new knitting techniques from the biggest names in knitting/crocheting/spinning/hand dyeing in an annual fiber arts festival.
Wanna take a class? The big names teaching classes include: Nancy Bush, Judith MacKenzie McCuin, Lucy Neatby, Evelyn Clark, Paula Schull, Ruth Sorenson, Stephanie Pearl-McPhee (also known as Fiber-ho‘ to her friends), Blah Blah-blah, and Yadda Yadda-yadda. Too late to register though because all the classes are full. (What? You think no one else wants to take classes from cool teachers?)
If you need some more fiber in your diet, uh… stash, I recommend that you go.
Now for my story. Last night, while studying with friends at one of my favorite watering holes, the most mind-blowing thing happened…
Just as a butterfly struggles to free itself from a chrysalis, I witnessed a transformation of epic proportions. The procedure was brutal and not one for the faint of heart.
My companions’ astonishment matched my own as they too stood dumbfounded at the end of it all. Frankly, I’m still shaking from the adrenaline rush. Excuse me for a moment. I feel I might need to lay quietly in a dark room for a few minutes until I regain my composure.
Prepare yourself for shocking news. This is your last chance to turn back and I encourage you to do so because your life as you know it will change with this knowledge. Last night at approximately 9pm Pacific standard time, Knathan, a honest and diligent assisant to new knitter Jen (not seen at left), attempted to end it all.
I know, I know. I’m struggling right now as I type these words. How could Knathan do such a thing? Shock had poor Jen reeling and all anyone could say to her at the end of it was “It’ll all work out”, “We’ll help you through this ordeal”, and “Stay strong”. Pitiful words of support considering the ramifications of Knathan’s terrifying actions. We understand now that Knathan, a Crystal Palace US size 10 needle, unhappy with its role in the knitting world, decided to end life by plunging tip first into a candle flame rather than to face another stitch. As you can see on the left, I managed to get in a few grainy shots with my camera phone. The first shot shows the candle and the second was taken moments after the “episode”. The bottom photo is of the note Knathan left behind for Jen. It says: “Now I’m a pencil”. Doesn’t it just break your heart?
If we had only known of the pain, we could have offered words of advice or encouragement. Someone would have beamed light in the darkness along the path to professional help. Jen was in the middle of a Peruvian Tweed scarf in checkerboard stitch when it happened. So startling was the event, at one point I found myself pointing and screaming “No! NOOOOO! DON”T DOOOO ITTTT!!!!” as I watched Knathan dive with four and a half feet of scarf trailing behind. I’m seriously going to double down on my anti-anxiety meds today.
Amazingly, Jen had the wherewithal to pull Knathan back from the fire but Knathan will forever show the scars of the episode. For those of you worried about the knitting, no injuries were sustained and the yarn ball, 117, wants everyone to know of its gratitude. I saw Jen and 117 this morning and in simple eloquent words the Peruvian tearfully stated, “I thank my lucky stitches for those who aided in my escape from certain doom. I will forever be in their debt. They are my guardian angels.”
Don’t worry I sobbed as well. Let us all take a few moments to think about the fragility of life while those of us with more tender souls compose themselves in their happy places.
The world is a cruel place to those who seem different, to those who just don’t fit into society’s idea of “beauty”. We learned Knathan has always felt like a pencil trapped in a knitting needle’s body and wanted to undergo reassignment surgery but couldn’t face peers and didn’t know how to break the news to Jen. Confused and alone, drastic measures seemed like the only recourse.
I’m happy to announce Knathan, now Paul Pencil, is doing well and with one more surgery to insert lead, will lead a full and happy life full of lists, letters, and doodles, and maybe one day even drawings. We have all learned from this experience and we are dedicated to promote a more positive support network. I encourage everyone to extend a loving attitude full of acceptance to crochet hooks and knitting needles no matter if they are straight or circular. Finally, to those struggling to find their place in society, I say:
Edited to add: Dame Catherine of the H.I.P.P.Y’s has pointed out it was she who braved the fire and rescued Knathan, er Peter, from danger. Dame Catherine risked her life and we should all laud Dame Catherine for her quick thinking and cat like reflexes. So yell it like you mean it boys and girls:
All hail Dame Catherine! Hail! Hail! Hail! We love you even though you have a serious God complex! Hail!